I grew up in a time where you respected anyone who was older than you. That meant even your best friends older brother or sister deserved a degree of respect. Words such as please and thank you were high in the "etiquette" vocabulary. Even to this day - I still hold anyone older than me in high regard; smile, "have a nice day", even hold the door as a courtesy.
There did this value go...I think it got lost somewhere between the '90's and today. The youth of today have very little respect for anyone but themselves. On many an occasion I have had a store door slam in my face as the uncaring youth (sans pants below crotch) walked thru without a second thought to me with 3 grocery bags in my hands.
Family invitations 40 years ago primarily included the mom and the dad; and if not an adult party the children would be included. Strict warnings prior to arrival would be "behave", "mind your manners" and remember this one "children are to be seen and not heard".
With my family of 3 adult children I always asked the host if the children would be welcome and never made the assumption that they would be. At a younger age...it might have been suggested to get a babysitter for the evening. Now it is not assumed by me that the kids are included.
Now I put the shoes on the "adult children" feet. Recently an invitation was addressed to the older family members with regards to a "family" gathering. I immediately responded that myself and my children would be attending and requested a reply as to what we could bring in the way of food or drink as a contribution to the day.
One "adult" family member replied non-attendance due to a previous engagement. So we "assumed" (as I'm sure did the host) that "non-attendance" implied the entire family. I am to now understand that 2 of their children will be attending with their "significant"others...but I believe they have failed to advise the hostess. Hence "ass"umption..... who looks like the ass here....the adult non-attending? their children? I bet none of these "unconfirmed" guests will consider the food and beverages likely to be consumed....should they contribut....most definitely.
Where did the respect for elders go....it has been lost someone in the past 40 years....such a shame....I hope I have raised more "respectful" adult children than some others....
Here's to an "exciting" family gatering!!!
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I completely agree. It's a scary new generation parents have created. For the most part, it's a generation of children who expect to have everything handed to them and who believe they should start at the top rather than working their asses off to get there. I, for one, am hoping to change this. Mr. and Mrs. is coming back for my little guy. There is hope.
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